Wednesday, 5 February 2014

Question of the Week: Do you ever wish your hair had a different texture?

You are now entering a judgement free zone! The question of the week is a taboo topic on whether you ever wish your hair had a different texture? In the natural world we are all a little bit kumbaya about hair, aren't we? We say all textures are beautiful, we show love and support even when someone has a hairstyle that was not properly executed or is unflattering.

We strive to be non-critical about embracing natural hair but if you ever dared to say that you wished your 4a hair was a little more 3b, it would be in general an unacceptable viewpoint.Why?

Some of us are realists and fully understand that the hair you have on your head is not going to change. If you are in this group, your goal becomes managing and styling your hair to the best of your capacity. However, shouldn't the natural hair club also be inclusive and give those who do not feel the same way, but are nonetheless natural, a soft place to fall?

Today I am asking, have you ever wished your hair was a different texture and if so why? Give your answers in the poll to the right and leave your comments! BE HONEST!


36 comments:

  1. yes i do 4a - 3c instead cause the 4c is really time consuming

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    1. Yes I have 4c hair and I pretty much dedicate a full day a week to it, which is a lot.

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  2. I sometimes just wish all of my hair was uniform more so than a different pattern. I wish it was ALL 3C or ALL 4A instead of the combo. And I also wish my hair wasn't so fine and fragile.

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    1. Interesting! My hair is marginally looser in the back but not to an extent where it requires different care from the rest of the head. Fine hair is the devil but what can you do, eh?

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    2. YASS! This used to be my exact wish too: thicker strands and a more uniform texture/pattern. I have all of the type 4 patterns (some 3s in the back) and various textures, so I wouldn't care if my hair changed to 4A or 4C, as long as it were just one or the other. I find that the multi-textured nature of my hair impacts length retention at the borders of each different texture--there's more tangling and knotting in these areas than anywhere else on my head :(

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    3. Me too. Sometimes it's just so handful! But I still love my hair!

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  3. I have never wished my hair was like anyone's own. But in the past when I was quite ignorant about varying hair textures, I have questioned why some people's hair could achieve a wash and go, while some's hair couldn't

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  4. Grew up at a time/place when natural hair was unacceptable. I have 3C and I used to wish for a different texture, but now I'm seeing that it's all good! I'm learning some natural styles and I like my texture.

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  5. In passing. I might see a lovely head of hair and think 'ooh, what I would do with hair like that'. It might be a looser curl, but the heads I really envy are definitely 4b and 4c like me, girls who have kept their hair healthy and long and lovely. And if I recognise a low po head (yes that's possible), I admire and respect their good work. As much as I struggle with my hair, I know it. Give me a different head and I'd be lost. So I also have negative thoughts towards hair not 4c.

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  6. In the beginning FOR SURE! When you're transitioning you dont REALLY know what you're in for. And even when you big chop, there is still an additional "transition" period where your hair isn't at it's best and neither is your perception of it. I thought I would have my sister's looser texture, and I was BUMMED out about it. Now? I'm 3 years in and I've grown my hair longer than it was relaxed and I know exactly how to maintain it which makes me so PROUD of me and my hair! The only thing I envy is to have the same texture all over so I don't have to do little tricks to get certain parts to act a certain way.

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  7. I voted "Yes, but I got over it" because at different times in my natural hair life I've been frustrated with my high shrinkage and wished for a less-shrinky texture...even to the point of considering texturizing. In fact I did texturize briefly when I first started out (mid-1990s).

    However, I am grateful for my texture because if I can wear my hair in its natural state AND appreciate it, I'd like to think anyone can. I call it "mostly 4b"; in order of high-low percentage it's 4b/4c/4a. Suffice it to say that in 18 years no one has ever said to me, "Well, you've got that 'good' grade of hair so it's okay for YOU to be natural."

    I can't express how frustrating it is to know that even in the 21st Century there are still so many black women who have been taught to hate their natural features because they don't conform to a "mainstream" beauty ideal. It doesn't make any damn sense! Not in 2014! And it REALLY burns me up when WE (black women and black men) perpetuate this ignorance. For that reason alone I am grateful for the ability to present myself as an unashamed, dark-skinned, nappy-headed black woman. ALL hair textures, even mine, are "good" if they're healthy.

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  8. Yes! I wish I had curly hair, instead of kinky. I can't do anything with it that makes ME feel comfortable. So I get it flat ironed. It's all good. I still love my hair. I'm just quite envious of those who can achieve a wash and go. My hair doesn't believe in such things.

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  9. I understand all the sentiment but being mixed-race and relatively light skin. I have always wanted kinky hair instead of my 3c hair and darker skin. Not because I didn't like what I had but because I wanted to fit in. Being what I am, I was never considered a black person and that hurt.

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  10. Yes I do wish it was less kinky (because of the frizz) and more silky, not necessarily curlier. My reason is because I have a huge forehead with a hair line that is, in my opinion too far back and masculine :( Got it from my dad. Then on top of that I have a long face. I want to wear simple hair styles that can frame my face and hide my hair line without too much effort, without the use of a basket full of products, gels, complicated hair styles and hair tools. I use to relax my hair only because I was able to wear my hair out and have bangs without worrying about frizz or my hair just switching up on me. It was uniform all over and I was always guaranteed to keep the same style in tact throughout the day.

    Now that I am natural for almost 7yrs now I've learned that braid outs and occasional wash n go's with gel can help to minimize frizz and keep it organized. So now when I wear my hair down and the wind blows it back, I can just use hair pins to keep it in place while hiding the huge dome lol.

    I really do accept and love my hair but because it is of a multi textured kinky type, it can be unpredictable and that can be frustrating for a big headed gal like myself who is always try to frame my face with my hair in order to look normal :( If I had a normal shaped forehead and hair line then I couldn't care less what hair type I had.

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  11. No, but I do wish the products that use would be more available across the island, since my ability to manage my head of hair depends a lot on what is available to me, without the need to trek into the city.

    If I had to choose, I'd say... whatever hair type has no quarrel with the readily available store-bought stuff. My hair is 4a (I think).

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  12. Thank you all so much for sharing! I love reading all the diverse reasons for our choices and decisions!

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  13. My hair is a 4a/3c mix. It is frustrating sometimes to deal with two different textures, but I mostly used to wish that my hair was kinkier! Once I got past the TWA phase, I couldn't really rock that round afro look without a LOT of styling effort, and even then it only lasted a day. But almost 2.5 years in, I've hit my stride and found products that help me maintain the curl uniformity I get from twist-outs, so I'm happy with what I've got.

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  14. Yes. Like 3B ish. Why? It is easier to maintain.Less prone to tangles and breakage which means that you see growth faster. I would love to just leave some conditioner in my hair and go. With my 4A hair, I have to spend another 30 minutes raking gel through it. With 3B hair, the curls easily bounce back. Once my curls get crushed, nothing but water will bring them back.

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  15. I voted Yes but I'm Over it. It is what it is--kink, frizz, shrinkage, ssks, multi-tex and all. I learned to work with what I got. Actually I think it's quite impressive and admirable that my "shrinky-est" sections can "kink-curl" all the way up to my cheekbone but can stretch down to my collarbone. I mean...that's freakin' cool! LOL!

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  16. oh yea! most definitely, my coils are looser at the back and so I wish the rest of my hair would be that loose. the reason is that this small section of hair breaks less, it has NO SSKs, very few split ends, responds to products and styles well, easier to manage, section and others. so a BIG YES! But i never wish to have type 3 hair because I just love the massive fro and high shrinkage that 4c has.

    Also, the only time I wish my hair was straight or of a looser texture is on wash days or when I have to handle it. Any other day, i'm ok.

    www.themanecaptain.blogspot.ca

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  17. I'm a "mature natural", who is 18 months post. I love my hair, my only "fight" with it sometimes is grey hair has a mind of it's own. All the numbers and letters associated with hair type seem to go out the window!

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  18. You know, I have never really thought about this. Maybe because this is my second time going natural...the first time was about 16 years ago and lasted all of 20 minutes until I went back to the salon and asked for a texturizer. So subconsciously I guess I did? Now...if a genie came and could grant a wish I would ask for my hair to be ONE texture, I have about three going on up dere. But I probably wouldn't pick the loosest as I have the least of that one.

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  19. No. I do not wish for a different hair texture. I have 4c/dry/thin strands/zero shine/not dark(brownish)/grows very slowly/not dense at all hair. What I wish for is hair that grows quickly.

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  20. i used to when there was this strange curl definition enhacing era in the community. Now I've learned to accept the texture, I like my 4c'ness ... I just wish the ends were more blunt and not as thin. I also wish that I had staple products and my hair would stop being so dry, and who doesnt want their hair to grow at a fast rate? So as soon as my hair gets to my desire length I'll start trimming to get that desired thickness from roots to end.

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  21. I do not wish for my hair texture to change, but I do wish that my parents accepted and loved me and my hair for what it is. I have thought "maybe if my hair was looser they wouldn't see me as a goblin", but I know they would as long as it wasn't straight. When I think about it, I enjoy my hair right now entirely (I would say it is 4c, by the way)! I quickly learned not to blame my hair texture for the reactions I get from others.
    One thing I would change is hair density and thickness. I would love to have thick strands, and a dense head of hair. I think I fall into the average category for both.

    Sorry for the tangent. :)

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  22. i have not consiously wished for a curl pattern other than my own, but i do wish my hair was coarse instead of normal-fine-extremelyfine and that i had a high density of hair instead of medium-low-EXTREMELYlow. i don't know i think people wish for other curl patterns because we have been led to believe that the best curl pattern to have bows down to the hair care methods designed for straight hair, but after learning all these things about about natural haircare, everything fell into place for me and it was so logical, so i'm envious of ANYONE, 3c or 4c who has thick high density hair, as i don't really care about texture and i can handle any of those.

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  23. I got over it. What made me start to appreciate my own texture was to follow women on youtube that had a similar curl pattern to mine. I am 3c/4a but I have more kinks than curls. So I no longer follow girls with 3b or looser curl patterns. It caused me to have hair envy. I still have a section of hair in the middle of my head that is transitioning but I am happy with my texture.

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  24. Different type nah. Im 4a and also have to give my hair its own day lol Different texture, yes. I'm mostly fine strands and they need to be babied. I'd love a lil coarse in my hair life lol

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  25. I am learning to love and manage my 4c hair, but sometimes I do wish for my daughter's looser curls. She rocks a wash and go without much effort, just oil and water and she is good to go!

    I'm not sure why I cannot comment on posts when using my phone :-(

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  26. Yes, that's why I used to put a relaxer on it. It never completely straightened it. I have 3b but wanted more of a 3a/b. Now that I've let my hair grow naturally, I NEVER, EVER even think of wanting a different texture than what God had given me.

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  27. I am the rare type with uniform curls in most of my head. I have 4a coily hair. I wish it would look the same as when it's wet. But more than a texture change, I wish I had fast growing hair. Like 1 inch a month. Instead I grows 1/4 to 1/3 of an inch per month. My hair grows so slowly.

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  28. I am currently transitioning and i haven't used a relaxer since September 2013 and from the new growth it looks like i have type 4 hair that's very thick.

    When i first noticed it i was a little disappointed as my aim for going natural was to have healthy CURLY hair and that wasn't what i was getting.

    it took me sometime to get over it but i would still like type 3 hair only because the new growth has become extremely painful to comb and get knots out. And i have yet to find a product that helps soften my hair.

    Hopefully in time i will learn to love my hair the way it is.

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  29. Sometimes I wish my hair had one curl pattern because it would be so much easier to detangle. I have a looser texture in the front and a small patch in the back that knots up at the roots. More than a texture change, the thing I hate the most is the looser section of hair has high shine whereas the rest of my hair is not.

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  30. I love my hair and I haven't ever wished for a different texture. I have wished for more hair stands and thicker strands because mine are very fine and fragile. It's taken some time to figure out exactly how to care for them abs handle them without crazy breakage.

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  31. I wish my hair was one pattern all the way through. Half of my hair (the back half) is fine 3c hair. On the sides and front is medium textured 4b hair, and the middle is a mixture of medium textured 4a coils and 2c waves. I wouldn't say I hate my hair, but finding ONE product that works for ALL my patterns and textures is difficult beyond words. I just wish it was either all 2c, all 3c, all 4a or all 4b. Just give me ONE pattern!!!!

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  32. Sometimes I think about what it would be like if all my hair were just one of the multiple textures that I have (3c, 4a, 4b), and wasn't so prone to split ends, or if I had someone else's texture entirely (well, my perception it anyway)....but then i realize that if my hair was like that, I'd be on a completely different journey.

    I have learned so much about this head of hair over the past 4 years and there are things about it that only I truly appreciate. The more I learn/know my hair, the more I love it.

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